after the jump, because it’s long and stuff.
so last year i did two recaps of the next food network star that were well received, especially the first one, which was about giada de laurentiis getting very upset during the taping of last year’s future of hell’s kitchen cast. at the time i was dissatisfied with wordpress and running out of places to put my pretty lil’ pictures on heart nibbler so i moved (stupidly) to vox.
turns out that six apart is true to its word on its suckage. i suffered a troll attack that forced me (unfairly) to delete the “offending” content and vox staff didn’t do anything to remedy the problem. so i left vox and i’ve never been back or more happer since.
sadly those vox posts are gone. had i stayed with wordpress and posted it, i could’ve blocked the ip address and not had to worry about a damn thing. those posts would be up, and i never would’ve started hearts for dinner. (although, now that you think about it, hearts for dinner is a better blog title than heart nibbler.)
anyway, if you missed the posts, here are some visual highlights of giada’s rampage through the sucky-ass tnfn contestants last year.
and, as we all know, the gourmet next door became food network’s greatest hit tv show ever!
anyway, the food network still believes in this show, if only for its ratings (and not because they can’t fact-check and stuff). look at this year’s crop of victims!
the first episode, to air june 1, will feature these hamsters cooking for food network stars! and possibly sandra lee! if pregnant giada shows up of course i’ll get to her caustic comments on hearts for dinner. i’m devoted to her and only her on the food network. (sorry, alton brown. can i offer you a razor?)
(sidenote: i probably won’t do hell’s kitchen or top chef. i can’t really snark on top chef; the show usually amazes me. [except for last week's sweeps-based wedding challenge.] and the only chef i wish would just diaf already is richard. hell’s kitchen: i have never seen such incompetent chefs in my life. and so recapping it would be, like, all sorts of vitrol and acid and “shut the hell up!” and all.)
